Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. (Ephesians 4:2)
Kindness and gentleness are sparse in our culture. They are so rare on social media. Our cultural icons rarely model gentleness and kindness. They may get an occasional positive spin, but they are not linked with strength or success. Kindness and gentleness do not get us “ahead.” Instead, practicing them often slows our pursuit of wealth and power. Consider the sitcoms, dramas, reality and talk shows, etc. They feature characters who delight in meanness or harshness, who regularly ridicule and insult others, or who “get ahead” by cutting others down. Whether it is chefs ridiculing contestants; hosts of political and sports talk shows harshly putting people down; and bosses in reality shows gaining fame by boasting of their power to fire people. Harsh characters are portrayed as rich, powerful, and successful. Even if are able to see the lack of kindness as a negative trait, we merely laugh at the meanness and harshness. We see those traits as part of what got them ahead (they have their own TV show!) In many ways, harshness is the glorified model, while kindness and gentleness are devalued. Sadly, we also see in churches where leaders seem to follow the worldly model that associates authority with harshness, and gentleness with weakness. The Bible offers a very different model. Through the example and teachings of Jesus, as well as the letters of Paul, the Bible describes kindness and gentleness as virtues: character traits we are called to practice, and part of the fruit of the Holy Spirit. What is the key then in developing gentleness and kindness in our culture that is so lacking in them? Perhaps the most important answer is found in Gal. 5:23-24, where Paul notes: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Kindness and gentleness are part of the fruit that the Holy Spirit bears in our lives. Two important things to note. First, God desires to develop in us kindness and gentleness; they are the good virtues of the Kingdom of God. When we pray, “Your kingdom come, your will be done,” we should desire these traits to be evident in our lives, words and actions; in the way we treat our family and others, even those we consider our enemies. God makes it clear that we should desire them, even if they are counter to worldly success. Second, the passage tells us where gentleness and kindness come from and how they become part of our character. They come from the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives. They don’t come from imitating our cultural heroes or mere self-effort. No self-empowered work will make us gentler against this world’s culture of harshness. We need the Holy Spirit to work within us, to submit to the Spirit’s work and to participate in that work. We must pray that the Spirit will help us be kinder and gentler, knowing that we can’t do it on our own. We invite the Spirit to do that work within us. Perhaps we need to start by simply asking the Holy Spirit to help us desire to be gentle and kind. Comments are closed.
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